为您找到与英语爆笑故事相关的共200个结果:
The suspicious-looking man drove up to the border, where he was greeted by asentry(哨兵) . When the guard looked in the trunk, he was surprised to find six sacks bulging at the seams(缝合线) .
"What's in here?" he asked.
"Dirt," the driver replied.
"Take them out," the guard instructed. "I want to check them."
Obliging, the man removed the bags, and sure enough, each one of them contained nothing but dirt. Reluctantly, the guard let him go.
A week later the man came back, and once again, the sentry looked in the truck.
"What's in the bags this time?" he asked.
"Dirt, more dirt." said the man.
Not believing him, the guard checked the sacks and, once again, he found nothing but soil.
The same thing happened every week for six months, and it finally became so frustrating to the guard that he quit and became a bartender(酒保) .
Then one night, the suspicious-looking fellow happened to stop by for a drink. Hurrying over to him, the former guard said, "Listen, pal, drinks are on the house(免费)tonight if you'll do me a favor: Just tell me what the hell you were smuggling all that time."
Grinning broadly, the man leaned close to the bartender's ear and whispered, "Cars."
一个形迹可疑的人开车来到边境,哨兵迎了上去。哨兵在检查汽车行李箱时,惊奇地发现了六个接缝处鼓得紧绷绷的大口袋。
“里面装的是什么?”他问道。
“土。”司机回答。
“把袋子拿出来”,哨兵命令道:“我要检查。”
那人顺从地把口袋搬了出来。确实,口袋里除了土以外,别无他特。哨兵很不情愿地让他通过了。
一周后,那人又来了,哨兵再次检查汽车上的行李箱。
“这次袋子里装的是什么?”他问道。
“土,又运了一些土。”那人回答。
哨兵不相信,对那些袋子又进行了检查,结果发现,除了土以外,仍旧一无所获。
同样的事情每周重演一次,一共持续了六个月。最后,哨兵被弄得灰心丧气,干脆辞职去当了酒吧侍者。
有天夜里,那个形迹可疑的人碰巧途经酒吧,下车喝酒。那位从前的哨兵急忙迎上前去对他说,“我说,老兄,你要是能帮我一个忙,今晚的酒就归我请客。你能不能告诉我,那段时间你到底在走私什么东西?”
那人俯身过来,凑近侍者的耳朵,裂开嘴笑嘻嘻地说:“汽车。”
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下面是读文网小编整理的9个爆笑英语幽默故事,希望大家喜欢!
Dan is teaching his son how to box. As he does so, he left his friend, "This is a tough world, so I’m teaching my boy to fight."
Friend: "But suppose he comes up against someone much bigger than he is, who’s also been taught how to box."
Dan: "I’m teaching him how to run, too."
拳击和赛跑
丹在教他的儿子怎样拳击。他告诉他的朋友:“这是一个粗暴的世界,所以我要教我的儿子怎么去拼搏。”
朋友:“如果他碰上的对手是一个比他高大,健壮而且也会拳击的人怎么办?”
丹:“我也会教他怎么样赛跑呢。”
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在繁忙的生活中,也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面读文网小编为大家带来经典爆笑英语小故事,欢迎大家阅读!
While vacationing in the Hawaiian Islands, I visited the World War II memorial atop the sunken U. S. battleship Arizona,a monument to those who died in the attack on Pearl Harbor. On board, I slipped on a stair-way and injured my thumb.
在夏威夷岛度假时,我参观了二战纪念馆。这个馆建在战争中被打沉的美军战舰Arizona号上,以纪念那些在珍珠港战斗中死亡的将士们。参观完上岸时,我在台阶上滑了一跤,把拇指划破了。
Back home,with the thumb still not healing properly,I called my doctor for an appointment. When I was asked the nature of my illness,I thought I' d give the background and began,"I was injured at Pearl Harbor..."
回到家后,我的拇指仍然没有愈合。于是,我预约了大夫。去看大夫时,我需要说清受伤的原因。我觉得要想把话说清楚必须要从头讲起,于是我这样开了头:“在珍珠港,我
受了伤……
" Well,”the nurse interrupted.“It took you long enough to report it !"
“噢,”护士打断了我的话说,“怎气过了这么多年,你才把它说出来?”
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在繁忙的生活中,也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面读文网小编为大家带来经典爆笑英语小故事四则,欢迎大家阅读!
When the young waitress in the cafe in my building started waving hello every day,I was flattered. She was at least 15 years younger than I.
在我工作的大楼里有间咖啡馆,那儿的女招待每天见到我都向我打招呼。我因此受宠若惊。要知道她至少要比我小15岁。
One day she waved and beckoned to me. When I strolled over,she asked,"Are you single?"
有一天,她见到我后,朝我招手示意让我过去。于是,我便走了过去。她问我,“你现在是单身吗?”
Why,yes,"I replied,smiling at her broadly.
“对,是单身。”我满脸堆笑地说。
" So is my mom,”she said.”Would you like to meet her?"
“我母亲也是,”她说:“你愿意不愿意见见她。”
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在繁忙的生活中,也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面读文网小编为大家带来经典爆笑英语小故事四则,欢迎大家阅读!
When we work evenings .we often order take-out food at the office.One night we all gave our orders to Sharon, who wrote the selections on a self-stick note. Unable to find our list when she arrived at the fastfood restaurant, Sharon stepped up to the counter. But before she could speak, the cashier recited the exact order. " How could you possibly know that?"asked Sharon.
在我晚上上夜班的办公室,大家常常订些外卖食品来吃。一天夜里,我们都找沙伦订了食品。她把订单列在一张不干胶的纸条上。等她到了饭店时,怎么也找不到那张订单了。沙伦走到柜台前,还没等她说话,收银员就背出了所有大家订的东西。沙伦问:“你怎么会知道这些的呢?”
"Tt's right there," replied the cashier,"stuck to your chest."
“它就在这儿,”收银页说:“贴在了你的胸前。”
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在繁忙的生活中,也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默爆笑英语小故事四则,欢迎大家阅读!
My main responsibility as security inspector is checking on guards. One morning around three o'clock I made a surprise visit to a facility and found the guard sitting at a table with his arms folded in front of him as a pillow for his head.I cleared my throat,dropped my clipboard and rattled the trash csn, expecting him to wake up,startled and blearyeyed. No response. A few seconds later, he very calmly raised his head .looked heaven-ward and said,"Amen."
作为安全检查员,我的主要责任是检查那些值班人员。一次,大约在凌晨三点多时,我来到设备处,做了个突袭式检查。我发现值班人坐在桌旁,头枕着胳膊趴在桌上睡着了。我清了清嗓子,把我的记录夹扔在了地上,踢了一下垃极桶,想把他唤醒,吓他一跳,他睁开那双怪松的睡眼,但并没做出任何的反应。几秒钟后,他非常镇静地抬起头,望着天说:“阿门!”
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在繁忙的生活中,也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默爆笑英语小故事四则,欢迎大家阅读!
Whenever my husband, Ben, does minor work on the car,he invites our six-year-old grandson, Jake,to help.
每当我丈夫贪,给汽车进行大检修时,他总是叫我们六岁的孙子杰克来帮助.
One day,Jake's Daddy asked him, "What does Grandpa pay you for all that help you give him?"
有一天,杰克的爸爸问他:“你帮爷爷干了那么多的活,他给了你点什么?”
Hands on hips,Jake Looked at his Daddy in the eye and replied,"Grandpa pays me attention.”
杰克双手放在屁股上,紧盯着爸爸的眼睛,回答说:“爷爷给了我足够的重视.”
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在繁忙的生活中,也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默爆笑英语小故事五则,欢迎大家阅读!
A guy spots his doctor in the shopping center. He stops and says. "Two months ago when I was in your office, you told me to go home,get into bed and stay there until you called. But you never called. "I didn't?"the doctor says."Then what are you doing out of bed?"
一个人在购物中心看见了给他看病的大夫,他叫住了大夫说:“两个月前,我到你办会室去看病,你让我回来躺在床上,等你的电话。但你从来就没打过电话.”
大夫说:“我没打过电话吗?那你下床干什么呢?”
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在繁忙的生活中,也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默爆笑英语故事,欢迎大家阅读!
A few months after Tom and I were married一during World War II, he was shipped off to Pearl Harbor. In one of his first letters,he wrote,"I'm going to have a Navy battle-ship tattooed on my chest.”
二战中,汤姆和我刚结婚几个月,他就被派到珍珠港。在他早期的一封信中,他写道:“我想把海军战舰纹刻在胸前。”
Instead of pleading, I answered simply,“Send me a pitcture of your tattoo,and I'll have a duplicate put on my chest. "
我没有劝阻,只是简单地回了信:“给我寄一张你纹旁的照片来,然后我也在我的胸前仿纹一个。”
We have been married for 51 years. Neither of us has a tattoo.
我们现在已结婚51年了,谁也没纹过身。
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在繁忙的生活中,也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默爆笑英语故事四则,欢迎大家阅读!
On a visit to the United States,Gorbachev met a Russian who had immigrated to this country. "What do you do for a living here?"the Soviet leader asked him.
在出访美国期间,戈尔巴乔夫遇见了一位移居美国的俄国人。“你在这儿靠什么谋生?”苏联的领导问他。
"My brother, my sister and I work in a big factory.”
“我哥、我妹和我在一个大工厂工作.”
"How do these capitalist bosses treat you?"
“那儿的资本家对你们怎样?”
"Just fine,"answered the man.“In fact,if you are walking home from work, the boss picks you up in his big car and drives you to your door. Another time,he treats you to a dinner in an expensive restaurant. Sometimes he takes you home for the weekend and buys you presents.”
“还不错,”那人回答,“事实上,如果你下班回家,老板会让你搭坐他的豪华车,把你送到家。有时侯,他还请你去豪华的饭店吃一顿。有时候,他邀你到他家去度周末,还送给你礼物。”
Gorbachev was stunned.”How often does this happen?"
戈尔巴乔夫很吃惊:“这种事多久有一回?”
"Well,to me,actually never. But to my sister,several times. "
“嗯,对我嘛,还没有一次呢。但对我妹妹,已经有好几次了。”
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在繁忙的生活中,也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默爆笑英语故事五则,欢迎大家阅读!
When my great-grandfather became a centenarian,a newspaper reporter asked him how he felt. "Fine,"Grandpa replied. "In fact,I get around better now than I did a hundred years ago.”
我曾祖父百岁的时侯,一位记者问他感受如何。“很好,”曾祖父说:“事实上,我现在的活动范围要比一百年前大多了。”
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“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来英语趣味爆笑小故事,欢迎大家阅读!
Bring me the winner
-- Waiter, this lobster has only one claw.
-- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight.
-- Well, bring me the winner then.
给我那个打赢的吧
-- 服务员,
这个龙虾只有一只爪。
-- 对不起,先生,这只肯定打过架了。
-- 哦, 那给我那个打赢的吧。
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童话故事是儿童文学的一种体裁,通过丰富的想象、幻想和夸张来编写适合于儿童欣赏的故事。那么你知道童话故事用英语怎么说吗?接下来跟着读文网小编来学习一下吧。
1. Fairy tales weren't just meant for children.
童话故事不仅仅是写给孩子们的。
2. The teacher used to beguile her pupils with fairy tales.
这位教师常常给她的学生讲童话故事,借以吸引他们的兴趣.
3. Is there anybody who can tell a fairy tale?
有人能讲童话故事 吗 ?
4. The writer takes wellknown fairy tales and gives them an ironical twist.
作者通过讽刺手法对家喻户晓的童话故事进行了新的诠释.
5. Most children are intrigued with fary - tales.
大多数孩子都对童话故事感兴趣.
6. Please retell the fairy story in English.
请用英语复述这篇童话故事.
7. This is a fairy tale full of childishness and playfulness.
这是一部充满童趣的童话故事.
8. You might feel as if you are in a fairy tale.
你可能会以为自己置身于童话故事当中呢.
9. According to the author, why were the original stories told?
根据这名作者, 原始的童话故事是用来作什麽目的?
10. Other kidults still enjoy children's stories and fairy tales.
还有一些童心成年人仍然沉溺于儿童故事和童话故事.
11. Snow White was assisted by the seven dwarfs in the fairy tale.
在童话故事里,七个小矮人帮了白雪公主.
12. My daughter always asks me to tell her fairy stories.
我女儿总让我给她讲童话故事.
13. This is a common occurrence in classic European fairly tales.
这是在欧洲童话故事典型的现象.
14. The children hung about their mother, hoping to hear a fairy tale.
孩子们总是围着母亲, 想听童话故事.
15. Life fresh breeze for all the princess since then.
很想改一句童话故事的结尾:从此,所有的公主都过上了幸福的生活.
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一些有趣的英语故事,能够吸引少儿阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天读文网小编在这里为大家分享一些少儿英语简短小故事,欢迎大家阅读!
Jake was always sick. He repeatedly got infections—mostly colds or the flu—from patients. He considered himself lucky to be alive, considering what he’d read about deadly bacteria and viruses that were developing immunity to all the latest drugs. A hospital is a dangerous place. He wanted out of the hospital, but he had nowhere to go. He was no spring chicken. The pay, benefits, and hours were good. His schedule regularly included three- or four-day weekends.
But, he was just going through the same motions, day after day. He was at the top of the ladder for an orderly. There were no other jobs that he could qualify for, unless he wanted to go to school for several years to become a tech or a registered nurse. But those jobs would mean working in a hospital. He wanted out.
He wished he had stayed with his old job as an assistant pro at Brookside Golf Course. The pay was low and the benefits were few, but the game of golf was his passion. He loved teaching the game to others. He was a happy man when he worked at the golf course—the freshly mowed green grass, the blue sky, the white clouds. Not a sick person in sight—only healthy people, enjoying themselves. Why had he quit that job, he wondered over and over. Ten years ago, he must have had a good reason, but he sure couldn’t remember what it was now. His life was now a constant regret about the poorest decision he had ever made.
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将故事寓于教学中,是实现小学英语课堂高效的一种方法。下面读文网小编为大家带来小学英语教学小故事,欢迎大家阅读!
Steve Magellan, world-famous adventurer, has been missing for two days. The man who soared around the world by himself in a balloon took off in a single-engine airplane from a private airport in Nevada. He left at noon for a three-hour flight. The weather was perfect. There were no storms in the area. He took no emergency provisions. Presumably, he considered his flight to be little different from a trip to the market for a quart of milk.
He didn’t file a flight plan, so exactly where he went is unknown. Searchers are combing a 200 by 200 mile area by air. The terrain is high desert, with lots of ravines. “It would be very easy for a small plane like that to remain undetected for months,” said an officer from the Civil Air Patrol. The plane, like most small planes, did not have a “black box,” which sends out radio signals in event of a crash. A friend of Magellan’s said that he usually wears a watch that can send radio signals. But no signals were coming from that watch, if he was in fact wearing it.
Magellan had a knack for walking away uninjured from accidents, so friends and relatives did not seem to be overly alarmed. His younger sister said that it wouldn’t surprise her if he came strolling out of the desert in a day or two. Magellan made his fortune in real estate when he was young, and has devoted the rest of his life to pursuing world records in ballooning, piloting airplanes, and driving fast cars. The purpose of his afternoon flight was to find a suitable area to try to set a new land speed record for automobiles.
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当压力大山大时,阅读英语笑话不失为一种很好的减压方法,下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默减压英语小故事,欢迎大家阅读收藏!
Landon had made an unsuccessful attempt at the recitation,and the doctor,somewhat nettled,said:“Landon,you don't seem to be getting on very fast in this subject. You seem to lack ambition.Why,at your age Alexander the Great had conquered half the world.
兰登作了一次不成功的朗诵。教授有点不悦,对他说道:“兰登,你在这门课上好像进步不大,你好像缺乏志向。亚历山大大帝在你这个年龄可已经征服了半个世界。”
"Yes,”said Landon,"he couldn’t help it,for you will recall the fact, doctor, that Alexander the Great had Aristotle for a teacher.”
“是啊,”兰登说,“他没法不那样。教授先生,您回想一下史实,亚历山大大帝有亚里士多德做他的老师。”
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如何上好英语的故事课,相信是很多小学英语教师的疑问,今天读文网小编在这里为大家分享一些小学英语故事教育教学反思,希望能帮助到大家!
英语教学中进行故事教学的价值加以阐述,并就如何进行故事选择,如何进行故事教学,如何进行教学后的提升,以及故事教学中会出现的一些问题加以讨论。希望能给正在从事小学高段英语教学的老师以及有意于从事英语故事教学的同行们一些参考。
故事教学要以发展学生综合语言运用能力为宗旨,全面提高学生听说读写的英语技能,应该精心设计,精心施教。
(一)如何选择故事
1. 根据学生年龄特征选择
故事教学的一个重要功用就是提高学生的学习兴趣,选择一个好的故事将是学生和老师共同学习的兴奋点。在选择故事时,教师可以考虑以下几个问题:(1)故事是否符合学生的年龄与兴趣特点?(2)故事中所使用的语言是否适合学生英语语言知识掌握的程度和理解能力?(3)文句节奏与韵律感能否吸引学生仿读?学生接受能力范围内的材料才能真正起到教学效果,教师要根据学生学习情况认真选择。否则,教学和教育的效果就要大打折扣。
2. 根据学习要求选择
故事教学使复杂的语言简单化。通过学生熟悉的材料教学,可帮助学生理解、掌握新的语言知识,提高学生运用语言的能力。因此,在小学高段英语教学中教师应该尽量选择知识点集中、会话内容适中,同时能给人以启示的语言内容,学生才能够集中学习和运用相关语言知识。比如在学习动词过去时这一语言点时,最好选择学生耳熟能详并且用过去式描述的故事,如《狼来了》等。在根据学习要求进行故事选择时,不妨考虑以下问题:1)故事中所使用的语言与情节,是否具备重复及可预测的特性?在课堂教学中,教师可通过重复的语句与学生互动,也可运用发问技巧让学生对某些情节进行讨论和猜测,提高参与感。2)故事是否有清晰的情节和强烈的角色对比,且寓教于乐?故事内容情节清晰,角色对比强烈,能使学生专注于故事的发展。同时,好的故事能让学习者自然领略其中的深意。3)故事中所使用的语言与反映的文化是否真实与恰当?教师要能够判断故事中所使用的语言与反映的文化是否真实、恰当,而不至于因文化的隔阂造成认知偏差,传递错误信息。
(二)如何实施故事教学
教学过程无疑是最重要的环节。在故事教学中可以采取以下一些步骤:
1. 背景铺路
故事的背景知识有助于学生了解故事,减少学习障碍。
2. 听力开道
听力是学生英语能力中一项重要内容,故事教学不能离开对这一技能的训练。教师采用讲述或播放磁带、VCD等方法整体呈现故事,要求学生大概听出故事发生的时间地点、主要人物及故事内容,以强化学生听力技能。
3. 提问深化
整体感知故事后,学生可自主选择适合自己的方法,或者朗读、默读,或者分角色读,也可以单独完成。这是学生深入理解并细化学习的过程,阅读时要求学生用笔勾画出不能认读的词句或不能理解的内容,教师鼓励学生根据自己勾画的内容进行提问。同时,教师要整理出故事线索,在图片或关键词、句的提示下,根据故事发展的顺序对需要掌握的知识点进行提问和操练,帮助学生更深入地理解故事,掌握语言。
4. 线索回顾
通过自主阅读和提问扫清了学生对故事的理解和诵读的障碍,这时,教师可以辅助学生对故事进行回顾。教师提供一些关键词句,或者出示几组相关图片,请学生给图片排序并讲述故事,或者请学生根据出示的关键词和句进行拓展讲述。这样,既能检验学生是否理解故事,同时也能锻炼学生讲述故事、运用语言的能力。
(三)故事表演
表演故事是帮助学生内化并产出新内容的过程。根据学生的不同情况,教师要提供多种方式让学生选择,每一种选择都可得到相应的激励。
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英语少儿故事是英语教学中很好的教学材料,下面读文网小编为大家带来小学英语教学小故事,欢迎大家阅读!
It looked like rain. The sky was gray. It was almost noon, but the sun was hidden by a gray blanket. It was cool. There were no birds flying anywhere. A couple of birds sat on the telephone wire. Bob was standing outside talking to Bill. They both had their hands in their pockets. They knew that it was probably going to rain shortly. A sudden breeze blew some leaves off a tree onto the sidewalk.
A young woman wearing a dark blue coat and jeans walked by. She was walking a small dog. It was pure white, and pretty. It sniffed at a tree trunk. The woman waited patiently. Finally, the dog lifted its leg.
Bob said that he liked the rain. It was a nice change from the usual hot Los Angeles weather. And the plants could always use the extra water. Bill said the only thing he didn’t like about rain was that all the motor oil on the streets would get washed into the ocean, and so would all the trash.
"But that never stops the surfers," Bob said. "They don’t seem to care what’s in the water, as long as there are waves to surf on."
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