为您找到与英文笑话短篇相关的共200个结果:
下面是读文网小编整理的英文爆笑笑话, 希望对大家有帮助。
The Indian Who Could Foretell the Weather Two men were travelling in a very wild and lonely part of America. For days they had not even seen a house, only a few huts made of wood, or tents made of skins. Then one day they met an old Indian who earned his living by trapping animals for heir fur. They found that he knew their language and they had a little conversation with him. One of them asked him if he could tell them what the weather would be like within the next few days. “Oh yes,”he said.“Rain is coming, and wind.Then there will be snow for two days, but after that there will be bright sunshine.” “Is n't that wonderful?” said one man to his friend.“These old Indians know more of the secrets of Nature than we do with all our science. They have not been spoiled by civilization.” Then he turned to the old Indian. “Tell me,”he said,“how you knew all that.” The Indian replied,“I heard it on the radio.”
有两个人在美洲一个非常荒凉偏僻的地区旅行。好多天来,他们连所房子也没看到,只看见几个木棚子和皮帐篷。一天,他们遇到一个靠猎取兽皮谋生的印第安老人。他们发现他懂得他们的语言,就和他聊了一会儿。其中一个人问他,能否告知近几天的天气如何。 “哦,行啊”,他说。“就要下雨了,还要刮风。接着还得下两天雪。这以后,就是大晴天了。” “这不是太神奇了吗?”一个旅行者对他的朋友说。“这些印第安老人深知大自然的秘密,比我们有科学知识的人知道的还多。他们并没有被现代文明所迷惑。”接着他转向印第安老人: “请问,”他说,“你是怎么知道这一切的呢?” 印第安老人答道:“我是从无线电里听来的。”
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言,笑话是一种艺术方法。下面是读文网小编整理的英语爆笑笑话,以供大家阅读。
Unexpected guests were on the way, and my mother, an impeccable housekeeper, rushed around straightening up. She put my father and brother to work cleaning the guest bathroom. Later, when she went to inspect it, she was surprised that the once-cluttered room had been tidied up so quickly. Then she saw the note on the closed shower curtains. It read "Thank you for not looking in the bathtub."
不速之客就在路上,我妈妈,一个完美的家庭主妇,正忙里忙外地整理。她分配给我爸和我哥哥的任务是打扫供客人使用的浴室。一会儿之后,当她去检查的时候,她吃惊了,曾经一度杂乱的房间瞬间就被打扫干净了。接着她看到浴帘上有一张纸条,纸条上写着:“谢谢你没往浴缸里看。”
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
幽默寓于笑话之中,它是笑话的精料,智慧之所在。笑话是幽默的载体,一个成功的笑话能流传千古,听者和讲者都会感到快乐、欣喜,拍掌叫好!下面是读文网小编整理的短篇英语笑话,欢迎大家阅读!
Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.
"Look," said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!"
"Yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?"
The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting the pictures."
父亲在哪儿?
兄弟俩在看一些漂亮的油画。
“看,”哥哥说,“这些画多漂亮呀!”
“是啊,”弟弟说道,“可是在所有这些画中,只有妈妈和孩子。那爸爸去哪儿了呢?”
哥哥想了会儿,然后解释道:“很明显,他当时正在画这些画呗。”
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
许多人从幼儿园就开始接触英语,这个时候多阅读一些英语故事是很有好处的,今天读文网小编在这里为大家分享一些幼儿园英语故事,欢迎大家阅读!
A Clever Panda
聪明的熊猫
A little panda picks up a pumpkin and wants to take it home. But the pumpkin is too big. The panda can’t take it home.
一只小熊猫摘了一只大南瓜,想把它拿回家。但是这只南瓜太大了,她没有办法把这么大的南瓜带回家。
Suddenly she sees a bear riding a bike toward her. She watches the bike. “I know! I have a good idea.” she jumps and shouts happily, “I can roll a pumpkin. It’s like awheel.”
突然她看见一只狗熊骑着一辆自行车朝她这边来。她看着自行车,跳着说:“有了!我有办法了。我可以把南瓜滚回家去。南瓜好像车轮。
So she rolls the pumpkin to her home. When her mother sees the big pumpkin, she is surprised, “Oh, my God! How can you carry it home?” the little panda answers proudly, “I can’t lift it, but I can roll it.” Her mother smiled and says,“What a clever girl!”
于是她把那瓜滚回家。当她妈妈看到这只大南瓜的时候,很惊讶:“天啊!这么食的南瓜!你是怎么把它带回家来的?”小熊猫自豪地说;“我拎不动它,可是我能滚动它啊!”她妈妈微笑着说:“真聪明啊!”
浏览量:4
下载量:0
时间:
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来轻松幽默英文笑话三则,欢迎大家阅读!
Father: Oh, Jack, you have slept away the whole morning. Don“t you know you are wasting time?
Jack: Yes, Dad. But I”ve saved you a meal, haven“ I?
父亲:噢,杰克,你又睡了一上午。难道你不知道你这是在浪费时间吗?
杰克:我知道,爸爸。可我还给您节省了一顿饭呢,是不是?
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来轻松幽默英文笑话,欢迎大家阅读!
Each Sunday the minister called the children to the front of the church while he told them a story. Once he brought a telephone to better illustrate the idea of prayer.
“You talk to people on the telephone and don't see them on the other end of the line, right?” he began. The children nodded yes. “Well, talking to God is
like talking on the telephone. He's on the other end, but you can't see him. He is listening though.”
Just then a little boy piped up and asked, “What's his number?”
每个星期天牧师都会把孩子们叫到教堂前面,然后给他们讲一个故事。一天,他为了更好地阐述祈祷的含义,带来了一台电话机。
“你们和别人在电话里交谈,并没有看到电话线另一端的人,对吗?”他开始问道。孩子们点头称是。“好的,和上帝交谈就象通过电话交谈一样。他就在另一端,虽然你看不见他,但是他正在聆听你的心声。”
就在这时,一个小男孩尖着嗓子问道:“那他的电话号码是什么?”
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
英语诗歌是英语语言的精华,它以最凝练的文字传递时间与空间、物质与精神、理智与情感。下面读文网小编为大家带来精选的经典英文短诗,欢迎大家阅读!
What instinct forces man to journey on,
Urged by a longing blind but dominant!
Nothing he sees can hold him, nothing daunt
His never failing eagerness. The sun
Setting in splendour every night has won
His vassalage; those towers flamboyant
Of airy cloudland palaces now haunt
His daylight wanderings. Forever done
With simple joys and quiet happiness
He guards the vision of the sunset sky;
Though faint with weariness he must possess
Some fragment of the sunset's majesty;
He spurns life's human friendships to profess
Life's loneliness of dreaming ecstasy.
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来英文幽默笑话中文翻译,欢迎大家阅读!
The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.
"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb:
Barking dogs don't bite?"
"Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the
proverb, too?"
一个小男孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。
“没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:‘吠狗不咬人。’”
“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?”
浏览量:3
下载量:0
时间:
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默英文小笑话,欢迎大家阅读!
A bit of advice for those about to retire. If you are only 65, never move to a retirement
community. Everybody else is n their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be
moved, lifted or loaded, they yell,"Get the kid."
这里想对将要退休者提一点忠告。如果你只有 65 岁的话,
千万别进退休社区。因为那里人人都七八十岁或者八九十岁了。每当要搬东西,抬东西
或者装东西时,他们就叫喊,“让小的干吧。”
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默英文笑话精选,欢迎大家阅读!
The bus is very crowded.Aman tries to get on,but no one gives way to him.
"Hey,let me get on the bus."the man shouts.
"It's too crowded.You'd better take the next bus."a passenger says to him.
"But you can't go withou me.I'm the driver."the man says.
公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路.
"喂,让我上车!"那位男士喊道.
"车太挤了,你最好坐下一辆"车上的一位乘客对他说.
"但是没有我你们走不了.我是司机!"那位男士说道.
浏览量:3
下载量:0
时间:
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来少儿英文小笑话精选,欢迎大家阅读!
A man was telling a story to his son, a four-year-old boy. The boy noticed a lock of gray hair on his father's head and asked: "Why are some of your gray, papa?"
"Papa will get a gray hair every time his little boy is naughty," said his father, thinking to take the advantage of this opportunity to give him a moral lesson.
The boy thought for a moment, and then naively said: "Oh, I see why my grandpapa has a lot of gray hair on his head. I think he must have had very naughty boys."
有个人给他的儿子,一个4岁的男孩讲故事。小男孩注意到他父亲的头上有一缕白发,就问道:“爸爸,你的头发怎么是白的?”
他的父亲想趁机给他上一堂教育课,就回答说:“爸爸的小男孩每顽皮一次,爸爸头上就会长出一根白头发。”
小男孩沉思了一下,就天真地说:“哦,我知道爷爷为什么有那么多白头发了。我想他的儿子们一定也非常顽皮。”
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来幽默英文小笑话精选精选,希望大家喜欢!
Once asimpleton’s wife told him to buy some ice.
Two hourslater, he didn’t come back. She wanted to know why he didn’t come back and wentout to have a look. She saw he was standing in the sun at the gate and watchingthe ice melting.
“What’s thematter?” She asked him. “Why don’t you bring it in?”
“I saw the icewas wet and I was afraid that you would scold me so I’m running it dry.” Thesimpleton answered.
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来愚人节英文笑话精选,欢迎大家阅读!
The Taco Bell Corporation announced it had bought the Liberty Bell and was renaming it the Taco Liberty Bell. Hundreds of outraged citizens called the National Historic Park in Philadelphia where the bell was housed to express their anger. Their nerves were only calmed when Taco Bell revealed, a few hours later, that it was all a practical joke. The best line of the day came when White House press secretary Mike McCurry was asked about the sale. Thinking on his feet, he responded that the Lincoln Memorial had also been sold. It would now be known, he said, as the Ford Lincoln Mercury Memorial。
塔可钟快餐公司说他们买下了美国费城独立厅的大钟,并重命名为塔可自由钟。愤怒的市民打电话给费城的国家历史公园,要求确认这个消息。几小时后塔可钟快餐公司承认这只是个玩笑。当天最乌龙的事件还不在此。白宫记者会秘书Mike McCurry被问到这件事时,随机应变回答说,林肯纪念碑也被卖了,现在被命名为福特水星汽车纪念碑。
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来愚人节英文笑话,欢迎大家阅读!
Hotheaded Naked Ice Borer1995: Discover Magazine reported that the highly respected wildlife biologist Dr. Aprile Pazzo had found a new species in Antarctica: the hotheaded naked ice borer. These fascinating creatures had bony plates on their heads that, fed by numerous blood vessels, could become burning hot, allowing the animals to bore through ice at high speeds. They used this ability to hunt penguins, melting the ice beneath the penguins and causing them to sink downwards into the resulting slush where the hotheads consumed them. After much research, Dr. Pazzo theorized that the hotheads might have been responsible for the mysterious disappearance of noted Antarctic explorer Philippe Poisson in 1837. "To the ice borers, he would have looked like a penguin," the article quoted her as saying. Discover received more mail in response to this article than they had received for any other article in their history.
1995年愚人节。探索杂志著名野生动物学家Aprile Pazzo博士在南极洲发现了一种新生物:热性裸体凿冰虫。这种生物的头上有盘状骨头,血液丰富,温度很高,因此能够穿透冰层。他们以此来捕食企鹅。 Pazzo博士同时声称,经过详细调查,这种动物与1837年南极探险家Philippe Poisson的失踪有关:“对这种虫来说,他可能长得像企鹅。”探索杂志上还从来没有哪篇文章得到如此多的读者反馈。
以上就是读文网小编为大家带来的愚人节英文笑话,希望大家喜欢!
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
在演讲前多背几篇初一英文短篇演讲稿稿是非常有必要的,下面小编就分享初一英文短篇演讲稿稿给你们,希望对你们有用。
students, guests , teachers and honorable judges
good morning !
my great pleasure to share my dream with you today. my dream is to become a teacher....
as the whole world has its boundaries, limits and freedom coexist in our life. i don’t expect complete freedom, which is impossible. i simply have a dream that supports my life.
i dream that one day, i could escape from the deep sea of thick schoolbooks and lead my own life. with my favorite fictions, i lie freely on the green grass, smelling the spring, listening to the wind singing, breathing the fresh and cool air and dissolve my soul in nature at last. simple and short enjoyment can bring me great satisfaction.
i dream that one day the adults could throw their prejudice of comic and cartoon away. they could keep a lovely heart that can share sorrow and happiness with us while watching cartoon or doing personal things. that’s the real communication of heart to heart.
i have the belief that my dreams should come true. i am looking forward to some day coming when i am like a proud eagle, which flies to the blue and vast sky.
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
在演讲前多背几篇短篇英文演讲稿是非常有必要的,下面小编就分享短篇英文演讲稿给你们,希望对你们有用。
Thirteen Names of Virtues
十三项美德
I conceived the bold and arduous project of arriving at moral perfection. I wished to live without committing any fault at any time; I would conquer all that either natural inclination, custom, or company might lead me into. As I knew, or thought I knew, what was right or wrong, I did not see why I might not always do the one and avoid the other. But I soon found I had undertaken a task of more difficulty than I had imagined. While my case was employed in guarding against one fault, I was often surprised by another; habit took the advantage of inattention; inclination was sometimes too strong for reason. I concluded, at length, that the mere speculative conviction that it was our interest to be completely virtuous, was not sufficient to prevent our slipping; and that the contrary habits must be broken, and good ones acquired and established, before we can have any dependence on a steady, uniform rectitude of conduct. For this purpose I therefore contrived the following method.
我曾想出一个达到完美品德的大胆而又费力的计划。我希望这一辈子都不犯任何错误,我要克服所有的缺点,不管它们是由天生的爱好而引起的,还是由于习惯或交友不慎引起的。因为我知道,或者自以为知道,什么是对的、什么是错的,所以我觉得自己能够只做好事而不做坏事。但不久我发现,自己想做的工作比原先料想的要困难得多。正当我的注意力放在克服某一缺点时,另一个缺点却出乎意料地冒了出来。习惯利用一时的疏忽,而理智有时又绝非癖好的敌手。后来,我终于得出结论,仅仅抽象地相信完美的品德对我们是有利的,但还不足以防止我们的过失,坏习惯必须打破,好习惯必须培养和建立起来,然后我们才能希望我们的举止能够坚定不移、始终如一地正确。为了这个目标,我想出了下面这个方法。
In the various enumerations of the moral virtues I had met with in my reading, I found the catalogue more or less numerous, as different writers included more or fewer ideas under the same name. Temperance, for example, was by some confined to eating and drinking, while by others it was extended to mean the moderating of every other pleasure, appetite, inclination, or passion, bodily or mental, even to our avarice and ambition. I proposed to myself, for the sake of clearness, to use rather more names, with fewer ideas annexed to each, than a few names with more ideas; and I included under thirteen names of virtues all that at that time occurred to me as necessary or desirable, and annexed to each a short percept, which fully expressed the extend I gave to its meaning.
我在阅读的过程中,发现在列举各种道德品质时,各种分类都或多或少地存在分歧,因为对于同一个词的涵义,不同的作者可以做或多或少的阐释。例如“节制”这个词,有人把它的意义限于饮食,而另外一些人却把它的意义扩展到调节其他快乐、欲望、癖好和肉体的或精神的情欲,甚至将其推广到贪婪和野心上面。我总结出了13种美德,这是我当时认为必需的或适合的所有美德条目,并在每一项底下加了一条简单的箴言,它充分说明了我认为这个词的涵义所应有的范围。
These names of virtues, with their precepts, were:
这些道德的名目及其涵义如下:
1.Temperance. Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.
1.节制。食不过饱,饮酒不醉。
2.Silence. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.
2.沉默。说话必须对自己或他人有益;避免无益的聊天。
3.Order. Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.
3.生活秩序。将每一样东西放在它们应该放的地方;安排好做每件日常事务的时间。
4.Resolution. Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.
4.决心。做该做的事;决心做的事应坚持不懈。
5.Frugality. Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i. e. waste nothing.
5.俭朴。花钱必须于人于己有益;换言之,切忌浪费。
6.Industry. Lose no time; be always employed in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.
6.勤勉。不浪费时间,只做有用的事,戒掉一切不必要的行动。
7.Sincerity. Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly, and, if you speak, speak accordingly.
7.诚恳。不欺骗人;思想纯洁公正;说话也要如此。
8.Justice. Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty.
8.公正。不做害人的事情,不要忘记履行对人有益而且又是你应尽的义务。
9.Moderation. Avoid extremes; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.
9.中庸适度。避免极端;要容忍你认为别人应得的处罚。
10.Cleanliness. Tolerate no uncleanness in body, clothes, or habitation.
10.清洁。身体、衣服和住所力求清洁。
11.Tranquility.Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.
11.镇静。不要因为小事或普通的、不可避免的事故而惊慌失措。
12.Chastity. Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another's peace or reputation.
12.贞节。除非为了健康或生育后代,不常进行房事,切忌房事过度,伤害身体或损害你自己或他人的安宁或名誉。
13.Humility. Imitate Jesus and Socrates.
13.谦逊。仿效耶稣和苏格拉底。
My intention being to acquire the habitude of all these virtues, I judged it would be well not to distract my on of some might facilitate the acquisition of certain others, I arranged them with that view, as they stand above.
我的目标是养成一切美德的习惯,因此我认为,为了不至于分散注意力,最好还是不要立即全面尝试,而是在一段时期内集中精力于其中之一。当我掌握了那项美德之后,接着再开始注意另外一项,如此这样,直到我做满13条为止。因此先获得的一些美德可以方便其他美德的培养,而我就按照这个主张把它们排列起来,就像上面的次序一样。
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
在演讲前多背几篇高中英文短篇演讲稿是非常有必要的,下面小编就分享高中英文短篇演讲稿给你们,希望对你们有用。
You learn 中英对照
After a while you learn
不久你就会明白
The subtle difference
握住一只手和拴住一颗心
Between holding a hand and chaining a soul;
其间有着微妙的区别;
And you learn that love doesn't mean learning,
你明白爱并不意味依靠
And company doesn't mean security.
陪伴并不意味安全。
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts
你开始明白亲吻不是契约
And presents aren't promises;
礼物不是诺言;
And you begin to accept your defeats
你也开始接受你的失恋
With your head up and eyes open,
扬起头,睁大眼,
With the grace of a woman,not the grief of a child.
展示你女人的风度,而不是孩子的悲伤。
And you learn to build all roads
你明白应该在今天
On today because tomorrow's ground
将你所有的道路铺建
Is too uncertain for plains,and futures have
因为明天的地面是那么起伏不定,难以设计,
A way of falling down in mid flight.
而未来常常突然出现在眼前。
After a while you learn that even sunshine
不久你就会明白即使是阳光
Burns if you get too much;
如果拥有太多,也会灼伤
So plant your own garden and decorate
所以种植自己的花园,
Your own soul,instead of waiting
美丽自己的灵魂,
For someone to bring you flowers.
而不是等待别人给你带来鲜花和芳香。
And you learn that you really can endure…
你明白你真的可以忍耐……
That you really are strong
你确实十分坚强
And you rally do have worth.
你的确有自己的价值。
And you learn and learn
你不断明白更多
With every good bye you learn,you relieve…
每一次分手你都有新的感悟,新的释然……
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间:
笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来趣味幽默英文笑话带翻译,欢迎大家阅读!
"All the kids make fun of me," the boy cried to his mother, "They say I have a big head."
"Don't listen to them," his mother comforted him, "You have a beautiful head. Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes."
"Where's the shopping bag?"
"I haven't got one, use your hat."
“所有的孩子都拿我开玩笑,”小男孩哭着跟妈妈说:“他们说我长了一个大脑袋。”
“别听他们的,”他妈妈安慰说:“你的脑袋长得很漂亮。好了,别哭了,去商店买10磅土豆来。”
“购物袋在哪?”
“我没有购物袋,就用你的帽子吧。”
浏览量:2
下载量:0
时间: