为您找到与英文笑话大全爆笑带翻译相关的共200个结果:
At an exhibition of the world's best swordsman, the third-place fencer took the stage. A fly was released, and with an arc of his sword he cut the fly in half. The crowd cheered. Then the second-place man sliced a fly into quarters. A hush fell in anticipation of the world's greatest swordsman.
在一场世界最佳击剑手表演中,排名第三的击剑手上场了。一只苍蝇放了出来,剑划了一个弧,他将苍蝇劈成了两半。观众欢呼起来。紧接着排名第二的人将一只苍蝇切成了四半。现场一阵沉默,人们期盼着世界上最伟大的击剑手出场。
His blade came down in a mighty arc - but the insect continued on its way! The crowd was aghast. The greatest swordsman had missed his target completely, yet he continued to smile.
他的剑锋以一个巨大的弧线划了下来--然而那只昆虫还在继续飞行!观众被惊呆了。最伟大的击剑手完全错过了他的目标,然而他还在微笑着。
Why are you so happy? someone yelled. You missed!
你为什么这么高兴?有人嚷道,你没击中!
Ah, replied the swordsman, you weren't watching very carefully. They fly lives, yes - but he will never be a father.
啊,剑手答道,你刚才没有很仔细地看。苍蝇还活着,是的--但他永远也做不成爸爸了。
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A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan.
一个家伙正在看报纸,他的妻子走到他身后,用一只煎锅敲他的后脑勺。
He asks, What was that for?
他问道:这是为什么?
She says, I found a piece of paper in your pocket with 'Betty Sue' written on it.
她说:我在你口袋里发现了一张写有‘Betty Sue’的纸条。
He says, Jeez, honey, 'Betty Sue' was the name of the horse I bet on. She shrugs and walks away.
他说:哎呀,亲爱的,‘Betty Sue’是我赌的那匹马的名字。
Three days later he's reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan.
她耸了耸肩,走了。 三天后他正在看报纸,妻子走到他身后,又用一只煎锅敲他的后脑勺。
He asks, What was that for?
他问:这又是为什么?
She answers, Your horse called.
她答道:你的马打电话来了。
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A gentleman walks into a store and asked for a pair of gloves.
″Cloth or leather﹖″ asked the salesperson.
″Makes no difference? ″replied customer.
″What color﹖″ asked the clerk.
一位先生走进一家商店要买副手套。
“您是要布的还是皮的?”售货员问。
“没什么区别。”这位顾客回答。
“那您要什么颜色的呢?”售货员又问。
″Any?″ he responded.
″Size﹖″
″Give me whatever you prefer?″ the gentleman said? slightly exasperated. ″My wife will be back tomorrow to exchange them.″
“什么颜色都成。”他回答。
“号码呢?”
“您就随便给我拿一副吧,”这位顾客有点不耐烦了,“反正我太太明天都会来换的。”
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Bogota, Colombia - Police in the northeastern Colombian city of Arauca said Tuesday that they had detained a donkey named Pacho after a motorcyclist crashed into the animal and suffered serious injuries. "When there are road accidents and serious injuries, the vehicles involved are always impounded," said Diana Rojas, spokeswoman for the Arauca city police department. "We had to impound both the donkey and the motorcycle and put them at the disposal of investigators so they can decide what to do with them and whether to release them," she said.
哥伦比亚首都波哥大市:周二,哥伦比亚东北部阿劳卡市的警方说,一个骑摩托车的人撞上了一头驴子而且受了重伤,他们已拘留了这头名叫帕奇欧的驴子。“当发生交通事故并有人受重伤时,事故所涉及车辆都要被扣留,”阿劳卡市警方的女发言人狄阿娜-罗哈斯说道,“我们不得不把驴子和摩托车都扣了,将它们交给调查人员处理,以便他们可以决定如何处置以及是否释放它们。”
Pacho’s owner, Nelson Gonz lez, said no one should blame the donkey for Sunday’s crash. "Neither the donkey nor I were responsible because I was in front and the motorcyclist saw me," Gonzalez told RCN television.
帕奇欧的主人纳尔逊-岗萨雷兹说,不该把上周日发生的碰撞事故归咎于那头驴子。“驴子和我都没有责任,因为我当时是在前面,摩托车手看见我了。”岗萨雷兹对RCN电视台的记者说。
The motorcyclist remained in the hospital on Tuesday. The donkey, whose legs were hurt in the crash, is being held at a pound in Arauca till the investigation is concluded.
摩托车手周二时还在医院里,而那头驴子的腿在事故中也受了伤,目前它被关在阿劳卡市的动物待领所,直到调查结束它才能被放出来。
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One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions.
一天,父亲与小儿子一块儿回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。
Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?"
他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?”
"Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
“唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。”
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
“可是,爸爸,”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”
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笑话是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感,而感到好笑。下面一起来看一下英语爆笑笑话吧。
老师:约翰尼,为什么你每天早晨都迟到?
约翰尼:每当我经过学校附近的拐角处,就见路牌上写着‘学校-缓行’。
Will and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger.
Will said, "Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My father's the one who dug the hole for it."
Bill wasn't impressed, "Well, that's nothing. You know the Dead Sea ? My father's the one who killed it!"
维尔和比尔在争吵,谁的爸爸是更强壮的一个。维尔说:“你知道太平洋吗?那个坑是我爸爸挖的。”
比尔不屑地说:“那没什么。你知道死海吗? 那是我爸爸打死的。”
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笑话是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感,而感到好笑。大家想快乐每一天吗?一起来看一下这些英语爆笑笑话吧~
A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering. The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner.
The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let's get off the corner, people." A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again, "Let's get off that corner...NOW!" Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction.
Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?" "Pretty good," chuckled the veteran policemen, "especially since this is a bus stop!"
一名新警察与老警察开着警车第一次出去巡逻。 他们得到命令去疏散一群闲逛的人,于是他们开车去了那条街,看到路口站着一群人。
新警察摇下窗户:“大家注意了,快离开这里。”人们看了他几眼,没理他。他喊起来:“离开这里,马上离开!”大家都不知道怎么回事,但是在他的威胁下还是离开了。
新警察对他第一次执行公务的结果很满意,对老警察说:“我干得怎么样?”“你做得很好,”老警察笑着说,“尤其是在公共汽车站。”
1、Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?
老师:为什么你天天早晨都迟到?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".
汤姆:每当我经过学校的拐角处,僦看见一个牌子仩写着"学校----慢行".
2、Two Birds 两只鸟
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?
老师: 这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?
Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.
学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。
Teacher: Please tell us.
老师:请说说看。
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
3、The Fish Net 鱼网
"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?"
"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安?" 老师发问道。
"A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.
"把很多小孔用绳索栓在一起就成了鱼网了。" 小女孩回答道。
4、The New Teacher 新老师
George comes from school on the first of September.
9月1日, 乔治放学回到家里。
"George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.
"乔治,你喜欢你们的新老师吗?" 妈妈问。
"I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said.
"妈妈,我不喜欢,由于她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。"
that two and four were six too....."
5、A physics Examination 一次物理考试
Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates
在一次物理考试时,当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,尼克很快就答好了第一个题目。
were thinking it hard.The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then
这个题目是:为什么在打雷时,我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声?
hear the thunderrolls? Nick's answer: Because our eyes are before ears.
尼克的回答是:由于眼睛在前,耳朵在后。
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下面小编给大家整理的英文爆笑笑话六篇,希望大家会喜欢。
A man who sold brooms went into a barber's shop to get shaved. The barber bought one of his brooms, and, when he had shaved him, asked for the price of it.
"Two pence," said the man.
"No, no, " said the barber, "I will give you a penny, and if you do not think that enough, you may take your broom again."
The man took it, and asked what he had to pay for his shave.
"A penny." said the barber.
"I will give you a half-penny, and if that is not enough, you may put my beard on again."
卖扫帚的人和理发师
一个卖扫帚的人去一家理发店修面.理发师向他买了一把扫帚.当理发师给他修完面后,问了一下扫帚的价钱.
卖扫帚的人说:"两便士"
"不,不"理发师说,"我只出一便士.如果你认为不够的话,可以把扫帚拿回去."
卖扫帚的人取回了扫帚,随后问修面要付多少钱.
卖扫帚的人说:"我只能给你半个便士,如果你认为不够的话,你可以把胡子再替我装上."
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下面是读文网小编整理的英文爆笑笑话, 希望对大家有帮助。
The Indian Who Could Foretell the Weather Two men were travelling in a very wild and lonely part of America. For days they had not even seen a house, only a few huts made of wood, or tents made of skins. Then one day they met an old Indian who earned his living by trapping animals for heir fur. They found that he knew their language and they had a little conversation with him. One of them asked him if he could tell them what the weather would be like within the next few days. “Oh yes,”he said.“Rain is coming, and wind.Then there will be snow for two days, but after that there will be bright sunshine.” “Is n't that wonderful?” said one man to his friend.“These old Indians know more of the secrets of Nature than we do with all our science. They have not been spoiled by civilization.” Then he turned to the old Indian. “Tell me,”he said,“how you knew all that.” The Indian replied,“I heard it on the radio.”
有两个人在美洲一个非常荒凉偏僻的地区旅行。好多天来,他们连所房子也没看到,只看见几个木棚子和皮帐篷。一天,他们遇到一个靠猎取兽皮谋生的印第安老人。他们发现他懂得他们的语言,就和他聊了一会儿。其中一个人问他,能否告知近几天的天气如何。 “哦,行啊”,他说。“就要下雨了,还要刮风。接着还得下两天雪。这以后,就是大晴天了。” “这不是太神奇了吗?”一个旅行者对他的朋友说。“这些印第安老人深知大自然的秘密,比我们有科学知识的人知道的还多。他们并没有被现代文明所迷惑。”接着他转向印第安老人: “请问,”他说,“你是怎么知道这一切的呢?” 印第安老人答道:“我是从无线电里听来的。”
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英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言,笑话是一种艺术方法。下面是读文网小编整理的英语爆笑笑话,以供大家阅读。
Unexpected guests were on the way, and my mother, an impeccable housekeeper, rushed around straightening up. She put my father and brother to work cleaning the guest bathroom. Later, when she went to inspect it, she was surprised that the once-cluttered room had been tidied up so quickly. Then she saw the note on the closed shower curtains. It read "Thank you for not looking in the bathtub."
不速之客就在路上,我妈妈,一个完美的家庭主妇,正忙里忙外地整理。她分配给我爸和我哥哥的任务是打扫供客人使用的浴室。一会儿之后,当她去检查的时候,她吃惊了,曾经一度杂乱的房间瞬间就被打扫干净了。接着她看到浴帘上有一张纸条,纸条上写着:“谢谢你没往浴缸里看。”
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下面是读文网小编整理的英语笑话大全,欢迎大家阅读!
Our physics professor was struggling to draw the class into discussion of Archimede's principle of water displacement. He told us that Archimede noticed that when he got into a pool at the public bathhouse, the water rose spilling over the edge. Excited at his discovery, he ran down the street yelling, "Eureka, eureka!" The instructor asked if anyone knew what that meant.
One student stood up and answered, "I'm naked ! I'm naked!"
我们的物理教授千方百计引导我们讨论阿基米德的排水原理。他告诉我们阿基米德去公共浴池洗澡,他进入池子,发现水涨高了,溢出池沿。他对这一发现十分激动,跑到街上高叫:“Eureka,Eureka!”教授问我们谁知道他喊的是什么意思。
一个学生站起来答道:“我光屁股啦,我光屁股啦!”
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下面是读文网小编整理的英语爆笑小笑话 带翻译,欢迎大家阅读!
Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year."He's a good boy," said Jack's father, "and if you let him pass this time, I'm sure he'll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well.""No, no, that's quite impossible," replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn't know!""Please, sir, give him another chance," said Jack's father. "You see, I'm afraid we don't take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill."
杰克到一所大学去学历史。第一学期结束时,历史课教授没让他及格,校让他退学。然而,杰克的父亲决定去见教授,强烈要求让杰克继续来年的学业。“他是个好孩子,”杰克的父亲说,“您要是让他这次及格,我相信他明年会有很大进步,学期结束时,他一定会考好的。”“不,不,那不可能,”教授马上回答,“你知道吗?上个月我问他拿破仑什么时候死的,他都不知道。”“先生,请再给他一次机会吧。”杰克的父亲说,“你不知道,恐怕是因为我们家没有订报纸,我们家的人连拿破仑病了都不知道。”
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“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来英文幽默笑话中文翻译,欢迎大家阅读!
The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.
"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb:
Barking dogs don't bite?"
"Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the
proverb, too?"
一个小男孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。
“没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:‘吠狗不咬人。’”
“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?”
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多看一些励志的英文句子,为自己加油鼓劲的同时还能提高自己的英语水平,今天读文网小编在这里为大家分享一些励志英语美句大全,希望大家会喜欢这些励志英文语录!
1、人的志向,应在千里之外。
Should the aspirations of people, thousands of miles away.
2、把握住这天,胜过两个明天。
Seize the day, is worth two tomorrow.
3、不怕别的,有勇气就不放弃!
Afraid of nothing, have the courage to not give up!
4、生命是一张弓,那弓弦是梦想。
Life is a bow, the bowstring is a dream.
5、汗水浇灌希望,奋斗决定命运。
Sweat hope, the fight destiny.
6、突破心理障碍,才能超越自己。
Can break through psychological barriers, beyond ourselves.
7、最伟大的力量,就是同心合力。
The greatest power is the collaboration.
8、冲刺拼搏,在前进中寻找乐趣。
The sprint, have fun in advance.
9、快乐要懂得分享,才能加倍快乐。
Will know how to share happiness, to double happiness.
10、做事不能知难而退,要积极向前。
Do not retreat, to a positive forward.
11、只要朝着阳光,便不会看见阴影。
As long as the sun, will not see the shadow.
12、用激情点燃高考,用拼搏换取成功。
With passion to ignite the university entrance exam to strive for success.
13、人不能样样顺利,但可以事事努力。
People can't everything smooth, but can try to everything.
14、大胆勇敢是取得提高所付出的代价。
To improve the price is bold and brave.
15、莫为失败找借口,多为成功找理由。
Mo excuses for failure, how to find reason for success.
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笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来趣味幽默英文笑话带翻译,欢迎大家阅读!
"All the kids make fun of me," the boy cried to his mother, "They say I have a big head."
"Don't listen to them," his mother comforted him, "You have a beautiful head. Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes."
"Where's the shopping bag?"
"I haven't got one, use your hat."
“所有的孩子都拿我开玩笑,”小男孩哭着跟妈妈说:“他们说我长了一个大脑袋。”
“别听他们的,”他妈妈安慰说:“你的脑袋长得很漂亮。好了,别哭了,去商店买10磅土豆来。”
“购物袋在哪?”
“我没有购物袋,就用你的帽子吧。”
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笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面读文网小编为大家带来儿童幽默英文笑话带翻译,欢迎大家阅读!
Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel director's office.
What is the meaning of this? the director asked. When you applied for the job, you told us you had five years' experience. Now we discover this is the first job you ever held.
Well, the young man said, in your advertisement you said you wanted somebody with imagination.
一个年轻人在被雇用几个星期后,被叫到人事经理的办公室。
这是什么意思?经理问,当你申请这份工作时,你告诉我们有五年工作经验,现在我们发现这其实是你的第一份工作。
嗯,年轻人回答,你们的广告上说需要找一个有想象力的人嘛。
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